I Feel a Shout Comin' On!

 Growing up in a Black Episcopalian church was a unique experience that really shaped who I am today. It wasn’t just a place to go on Sundays; it was a vibrant community where our culture and values shone brightly, free from the usual influences of whiteness. Here, I found a sense of belonging that was all about us—our stories, our music, and our traditions were front and center.

The way we worshiped was so different from what I’d seen elsewhere. Our sermons were powerful and relatable, often filled with the rhythm and passion of African American oral traditions. They spoke directly to our lives, connecting our personal experiences with the bigger issues we faced. And the music? It was everything! From soulful hymns to energetic gospel songs, the church was alive with joy and celebration, making every service feel like a party where we could really express ourselves.

What stood out even more were the values we embraced. We learned the importance of community and service, not just within the church but in our neighborhoods too. Helping others and standing up for what’s right were woven into our faith. It wasn’t just about showing up on Sundays; it was about making a difference in the world around us. This sense of responsibility helped me understand the importance of being a voice for those who might not have one.

As I grew older, I became disillusioned with the church. I started to see some of the contradictions and shortcomings that didn't align with the values I had learned. The explicit bias surrounding non-heterosexual people was a huge issue for me. I witnessed my brother be treated poorly by "saints" who fell victim to the "one right way" mindset and used binary thinking to ostracize him. Being by his side while he came to terms with being told he could be gay or he could go to hell is seared into my mind. It was tough reconciling my experiences and the lessons I held dear with the realities I encountered. While my upbringing gave me a strong foundation in my Black identity and the importance of community, my adult experiences led me to question how that faith fit into my life moving forward. I may no longer agree with all of the beliefs I was taught, but church was one place where I felt connected deeply to my cultural roots and established a strong connection with my community.